I see people doing what I am not capable of doing at the moment and sometimes ever. I get angry and sometimes borderline jealous. I am not the jealous type. If I see that you’re doing your thing I will praise you and want to get with you so that you can teach me how to do my thing. I won’t try and vindictively be your friend so that I can crush you where you stand because I am envious of your success.
To me, Jealousy and envy are a little different from one another. Envy is where you’re totally infatuated with a person. You’re so into their business that you forget about your own. You always try to seek and dig up dirt on that person because you believe in your head that they don’t deserve what they have. But deep down inside you would love to be in their position. Kind of sick if you think about it.
And everyone wants to be the person who is envied. Because if people envy you then guess what, you’re probably doing what you need to do in life. Unfortunately, there are delirious people in our world that really believe that someone actually cares enough to envy them. I know a few personally. They are always saying how people are hating on them and how everyone has their name in their mouth. And I just look at them.
I want to say to them: sweetie, you have no home, you have no car, you have a trillion kids, you don’t go to school, you dress horribly and you don’t look that good. Who in their right mind would be envious of you?! Because frankly, you are just not that important.
But I am a nice person, I listen and nod every once in a while.
I transgress. Is it ok for me to talk to a girl and hear that she is getting everything she wants from her husband and actually be a little jealous of her life? I am thinking that I have to bust my butt every day at work while everyone else gets to enjoy their weekend. I am thinking that why couldn’t I be in a position to get taken care of by a man.
Is it ok for me to get jealous when I hear that her man is taking her all over the world on lavish trips while I sit at home and watch cable? What about a woman who is pursuing her career and doing what she wants to do when she wants to do it while I sit at work tied down by financial restraints? Is that fair?
Every time I find myself drifting into that state of envy I have to pull myself back for a second. I have to ask myself, is this person 100 percent happy or do they as well have faults? Does this person wish they had certain attributes that I have? And what am I doing in my life to get to where that certain person is? Or better yet how am I paving my own future?
When I answer these questions truthfully then I can fully understand that there is no reason to be jealous or envious of others. Because we all want to be someone else. We all want to run away and start over again so we can have the future we think we deserve. If only this and if only that. We say it all the time but we can’t change what’s been done. We can’t change destiny. We chose the path that we’re are living.
We need to understand that we all have free will and there is either path A or path B. The path we take is where we are headed and we can always change courses but it still won’t undo what we have created. It will only change the future path of where we are going. That’s the most important thing I need to ask myself: Where am I going? And it’s what you need to ask yourself as well.
Keep it real with yourself. You’re the realest person that you’ll ever meet.
Much love,
The Juicy Details
xoxoxo
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